Charlie

I am in awe of this incredible little girl.  She has been asking questions lately that I am not ready to answer. She asks a lot of the "tell me about when you were a little girl" kinds of questions.  A lot of them of late have been about my "DAD" or my "Step dad."  And though I am very lucky to have my real dad in my life now that was not the case for many, many years.  I like that Charlie's life is "perfect."  I like that she has a mom and a dad that both live at home.  I like that in the grand scheme of things her life is truly perfect.  Tonight she asked me a lot of those incredibly hard questions.  I don't know how to explain them to her.  (And mom if you are reading this know that I know you love me with every inch of your being.)
C:"Mommy, sing me your favorite song that your mommy sang to you."
Me:"I don't remember my mom singing to me."
C:  "But, didn't your mommy love you enough to sing you to sleep at night?"
Things were different for me than for Charlie.  How do I explain to her the things that I don't know or I don't remember?
Me:"Baby, my mommy loved me so very much.  You remember that I told you mommy did not have a mommy and a daddy at home like you do.  Mommy had a mommy (that's Nana) that loved her so very much but she had to work a lot so that mommy had a house to live in and food to eat.  Nana loved mommy very much but she had to work sometimes 2 and 3 jobs so that Mommy was taken care of."
We talked for ever it seemed like.
C:"But, Mommy,  Why did Nana have to work so much?  Why didn't your Daddy or your Step Dad help Nana?"
How do I answer these kinds of questions when sometimes I ask them myself?
Me:"C do you remember that mommy tells you not to drink alcohol or to take drugs? Mommy's Dad and Mommy's step Dad did not always make good choices.  They both choose to do these things.  And with those choices come consequences."
C:"Good consequences or Bad consequences?"
Me: "Bad consequences."
C:"Is that why your Step Dad is a bad man?"
Me:"Baby, My step dad is not a bad man but he made some very bad and mean choices."
C:"Does that mean that no one loved you?"
How do I answer these questions to a little girl when it was not so long ago I asked them myself?
Me:"Who loves you more than anything?"
C:"God!"
Me:"And what did God do?"
C:"He sent Jesus to die for us."
(And THANK YOU BETH MOORE and your SCRIPTURE memory challenge.  Because of that I had verses on my heart and in my head.)
Me: "God tells us that "The Lord your God is with you.  He will NEVER leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged.  (Deut 31:8) He tells us that in ALL things God himself will go before us and will be with us.  Good and bad.  God is always with us and will provide for us.  Bad things will happen in our life.  And no matter what, God is with us.  Satan may mean those bad things to harm us but God will always use them for good.  Like Daddy's job.  He lost his job at the Olive Garden but God provided him with a job that is going to be better for Daddy.  (1 Corinthians 10:13, Romans 8:37-39, Genesis 50:19-20)
C:"But how do we know that God is with us?"
Me: "Can you tell me where it tells us that God is always with us?"
C:"In the Bible."
Me:"And, what is the Bible?"
C:"It is God's word."
Me:"And what are we suppose to do with God's word?"
C: "Hide it in our heart so that we never forget what God wants us to know. Mommy, can you sing me your favorite song that reminds you  of God?"
So, I sang.  And she was asleep before I finished the song.

You are my all in all
Written by Dennis Jernigan

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord, to give up I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising up again I bless Your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down You pick me up
When I am dry You fill my cup
You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name
Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord, to give up I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name
Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name


Nicole Nordeman

Lord, I am so humbled to be this child's mother.  I pray that You will continue to put Your words in my mouth as she grows.  Continue to draw her near to you.  Allow me to stay out of your way.
Amen