DT for faithsisters--Grandmother Flo

This one actually needs a lot of explanation b/c it is kind of an odd title for a "grandparents" heritage page.

So, here goes tmi --
My mother and father never married. As an adult I realize that this was for a good reason. I met my real father when I was 15 (and his whole family). The thanksgiving that I met them my grand mother (dad's mom) introduced me to her mother (3 weeks away from death of alzhelmers) as a friend of the family. She also gave me a curling iron with a $.50 garage sale ticket on it when my cousins (2 older and 2 youger) got car speakers, a computer, a karakoe machine, and a ninetdo. I was very hurt. I held onto this anger for many, many years. Now fast-forward, I have a decent relationship with my dad now. We talk. We visit. I will never have a "father/daughter" relationship like I do with my father-in-law but I would say that we have a good relationship. Now, I am a new mother. My daughter Charlie is nine months old. We go to visit my dad so that he can meet his granddaughter. He decides (without asking) that we would have dinner in a restaurant with his family so that they could meet her as well. I was not okay with this. I did not want my children to ever meet his family (well really his mom) b/c I did not want to ever feel unwanted the way I did.

We had the meeting. I had a meltdown in the car on the way back to my dad's. My wonderfully preceptive step-mom encourage me to ask my dad any and all questions that I had about what had happened when /before I was born. So we talked. When I got home from my trip I spent 3 hours on the phone with my mother (the most incredible woman I have ever met) who told me that it all happened 28 years ago and it was old news and didn't matter but that she would tell me what she remembered.

I found out at this point that my parents had been engaged but that my grandmother flo had broken them up (from both mom& dad's precpective). In April of that year I sat down and wrote a note to Flo. It turned out 6 pages front and back. I told her how hurt I was and that I was going to begin to pray that God would help me to forgive her for things that she may or may not have known that had hurt me. (Before this note, If I said or heard her name anger would boil inside me). I wrote the note knowing that this was one note I would never send. (she was 80 something. she was not going to change and she was a very bitter old woman).

Fast-forward some more. I have now had a second child. It is again spring break this time I receive a call from that incredible step-mom of mine. Grandma Flo would like to come to my house for a visit. Would it be okay if they came to see me and stayed in a hotel? (they being my mom, dad, and grandmother Flo) Holy cow was I ready for this? I said yes, they came, it was a good visit.

Now, A year later, I document all of this. The white paper (hidden journaling) is that original letter. Handwritten and tear stained. In the circle is the definition of forgive that means the most to this situation "to cease to feel resentment against." The verse Genesis 50:17 "This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly."

The journaling that can be seen was written and dated this week "For years I held resentment toward my grandmother Flo. I was angry with the way that she treated my mother. I was angry with the story of her telling my mother to leave when she took me to see my dad @ six months. These were stories from Grams and Aunt Brenda (never my mother). Still I had anger. In 2006 my dad set up a meeting for his family to meet Charlie. This turned out to be a good thing even though it tailspined me into depression. I came home talked to both my parents and wrote a letter to Flo. I never sent the letter. Instead, I prayer. And God help me to forgive. The forgiveness if for me and not her. In 2009 she visited my home."

This is one of those not so pretty stories that I have to scrapbook about b/c it shows what an amazing God I have! I want my kids to know these kinds of stories.

If you took the time to read (sorry for the long post). Thanks. I hope that it blesses you as much as God has blessed me through the situation.