Never enough

I think I am battling depression.  I seem to be crying a LOT right now.  I cry a lot but lately it has been even more.  Tonight was another of those "never enough" nights.  I can not wait to get to heaven and be with Jesus.  Because I know that once there, I will never again have that never enough feeling.  I will be too focused on the Lord to worry about myself.  I have decided that my depression is just that selfishness.  I am just way too busy worried about myself.  That being said,  today was another "I'm not enough day."
-I did not get the house as clean as I wanted.
-I could not make B quit crying.
-C wanted only Daddy.
-Laundry did not get done.
-I dropped a cake pop.
- I was late--AGAIN!
-I can't find my keys.  Why can't I find my keys?  I don't know.  Maybe when I find my keys I will remember where I put them.
-D wanted to sleep ( I know I should not be upset by this.  He has not been sleeping well.  He requires 8 hours of sleep.  He got home super late.  He is working really late.  He did not sleep much the night before.)
-I put a pan in the wrong place.
-I did not put pumpkin in the french toast.
-I don't know where the space saver bags are.
-There are things in the kids craft closet that I did not know were there.
-I can't find the scissors.
- D cuddled with C and fell asleep.
-I hate the way my legs look.  I can't seem to look in the mirror and like what I see.
-My kids have no problem with me going anywhere that is away from them.
-I am going to the Auction by myself.
-I had a parent ask me if I was okay b/c I just seem like I might be getting sick.
-I got put at a table by myself.  (Well, not really.  I was with the Spanish teacher.)
I HATE days where I feel like this.  Where I feel left out.  Where I feel unwanted.  Where I feel as if no one would know/care if I were gone.  Where I feel as if I am not enough.  I HATE days where every little thing makes me defensive.  I HATE days where I am on the verge of tears.  I HATE days where I just don't feel as if I am enough.

I am forcing myself to repeat after each offense that God is enough.  His quite voice whispers I am enough after each one.  Especially the last one. I feel as if no one would care if I were gone.  "I, sweet beloved child, am ENOUGH!!! "